metafictions | jigokucho

What I still am, regardless of my form. A guide to some, an observer to most, a student as life allows - some called me sage, and I took that title gladly, after a long path to arrive there.

[so, offering advice to wayward beings isn't a new thing in their wheelhouse.]

But...the world grew uncertain, and reality itself frayed at the seams. Then, I encountered our mutual friend.

[A being that is neither here nor there, searching for an anchor and following a long journey to arrive.

The thought rings clear in Kamui’s mind: They sound like me.]

Hakagemachi. Something happened to that world, correct? And that’s how you found yourself connected to her?

Listen, I tell you this so that you understand, but not to go spouting this information off to the others, understood? Not everyone appreciates their unsealed wounds on open display.

[they close their eyes, tipping their head back to breathe in the smoke deeply. warning dispensed, they're relaxed again.]

...The world was falling apart, Uehara. Dying slowly, in fragments and pieces. Stealing places, bodies, memories, all lost to the great emptiness. Nothing was as it should be, and it was driving many to madness. Losing form, it is so easy to lose one's self in the process.

Of course. I'll hold the information close.

[It's not every day that he gets to hear a secret, after all. He falls silent, listening attentively.]

So she really is tethering you, then. [...] I'm sorry, Hibiki-san. For your world's loss.

It's nothing to apologize for. It was not something that could be avoided or undone. I've accepted the passing, and yet I still wished to survive, like any living thing. Perhaps that is why I found her, strongly wishing to live despite the odds.

She tethers me, and I tether her. It's an exchange.

[so careless it could be an accident, but visible enough to Kamui's careful eye, they shift in position, their hand brushing against the mask that Emily always has around, before settling back into another attitude.]

[He certainly takes note, but the relevance isn't obvious to him. Magic's not his forte: he couldn't begin to guess at how important their mask truly is. For all he knows, it's nothing more than a symbol of their pact.

He takes another sip of tea, polishing it off: Kamui's thinking as he reaches across the table to pour himself a second cup and refill Hibiki's. It's a gesture of respect.]

Could I also ask what you meant when you said you said you were an 'observer'?

It's exactly what it sounds like.

[their eyebrow raises in approval at him moving to fill their cup - good boy. he's caught on quick.]

I observe the world and those within it, to best pass objective judgement and to adhere to certain teachings I learned long ago. It's not solely the most powerful that can be called "great" - wisdom earns its own respect, though to claim I am wise, that would be audacious.

But it is not solely watching. It is taking in all the information, and understanding what it means. To sit in the forest, and accept all that would come in, and become it - for however long it would take you. How best to put it...

Tell me, Uehara, which man is wiser, a scholar or a street thug?

So it is.

[As he'd thought. Hibiki really is like him. Or what he would be, if he weren't so stifled within the boundaries of this world.]

Well. What makes a man a street thug is purely subjective. So you may as well word it as a scholar or a criminal, and, if that's your question... it varies. Has the scholar learned anything worthwhile? How much of the potential of his criminal power has the scholar's counterpart achieved?

A good line of questioning. Starting to scratch beyond the surface.

Now go further. What if the criminal became such because he had no other options, or never hurts the innocent? What if the scholar has greedy aspirations, or harbors a cruel nature? Wisdom is a trait humans associate with "goodness", but without clear boundaries, can you still be objective?

[the question isn't a trick - they're genuinely asking.]

You can't. When we try to establish those boundaries, we always fail. There's always something we don't consider there-- something that falls outside of those neatly drawn lines.

The wisest man I knew was wicked. I've found humanity in killers and criminals. Humanity's desires have often darkened the world with black poison, but there is no goodness or wisdom to be found among men who seek to cleanse that poison by eradication alone.

Now you're starting to dig. The simple answer is there is no simple answer to any of it. There are always exceptions, always things that won't make it easily as defined. Things that slip past the boundary - like you and me.

Even more fortunate that I’ve gotten to meet you and Emily here, Hibiki-san.

[Between them, the first stick of incense is beginning to crumble away, burning to its last, but its scent lingers, long after the incense itself has reduced to ash.]

Could I ask to keep meeting, from time to time? I think I could learn a lot from these conversations.

[He needs it. So adrift from his original purpose, someone like Hibiki is just the confidant he needs.]

jigokucho - ic inbox

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